Kindness
On my way back to Singapore, I did an online-check-in and I picked an economy seat that turned out to be the Premium Economy Class. The person next to me asked “ do you pay for the economy? I replied “Yes”, then he asked why did we get this seat?” I told him “I don’t know, just enjoy it”. For a second, I did curious when I saw the seat number, but I didn’t think as far as that person. I’m more thankful that I chosen the right seat; comfortable enough for 5 hours trip — spacious! “ A perfect blessing of Abundance to begin the day with “ That’s what I had in mind.
Then later, this person asked the flight attendant while she was serving him breakfast. At right at that moment, the word KINDNESS popped up and encourage me bringing up this topic from my point-of-views into this writing.
Personally, for Asian country e.g. Singapore, I believe people are not used of giving and receiving kindness whether it’s for themselves or from anyone else. They are more protecting themselves with fears rather than shining their light. While in my country, Indonesia, we love to give kindness but are not able to receive it open heartily.
The word kindness reflected back to recent memory when I was on holiday with my friend. She really likes this one item but did not want to buy; reconsidering it so many times although the money was not the issue. I asked her why didn’t you buy it?” She replied “what’s for?” but I know she really likes it a lot. For many times I convinced her buy them if you like consider it as present to yourself. And while she was waiting outside for me to shop, my heart told me “go and buy it for her; let her feel the joy of receiving”. So without thinking twice I got her the two versions of it. I gave her the two of it and she gave one back. It triggered me a lot, when she kept giving back and I told her to take it all because I knew she likes both! Then, I knew I raised my voice and said just get them, would ya! It’s an abundance. But little did I realize that she lives in a country where people doesn’t give abundance freely nor she often got the experiences of receiving. I am sorry, I put such a tone.
She was my mirror in the past. Clearly, I remembered before I got myself into these two retreats that it was still hard for me to receive abundances. And you know, while writing this, I realised I am so lucky that I am continuously receiving an overflowing abundance everyday without me being conscious of it. I was not rejecting it, but I was truly forgotten most of time to be more thankful and recognised it. It’s time for me to start to be mindful and thankful.
Personally, there are three simple reasons why it’s hard to accept kindness from others :
- We believe that we aren’t worthy
2. We aren’t being kind to ourself — no self worth
3. We belief that there is no such a thing called free in this world — what you receive, you have to return back in more/less same amount.
At the moment, you might be in denial but do rethink again of those three points which applied to you. For me, I felt strongly deep inside that I was not worthy for receiving kindness. I was taught in my culture when someone give, you give back. Somehow it should be balanced or else it doesn’t feel good — Ego and Pride. It is shameful if you don’t give them more or equally.
Lack of Kindness
Is what each of us lacking in this world; being kind to our self, receive kindness from anyone without conditions even by means a stranger.
We are not being trained to receive fully without a need to reply the abundances back. But, we are taught to give back kindness and when someone give us freely, we have more doubts than to just say thank you and sending gratitude. There are people who’re like myself, who just tend to give it away out of no where when their heart told them to do and I know a lot of people experienced that from me — to just give something out of no where with no reasons.
Everyone must heard “the more you give, the more you receive”, but I against it. If you give with conditions or hope something in return, you are not going to receive more; instead your good deeds are not counted. When you give, give unconditionally with love and no expectations of getting something in return. With that, you are planting your seeds & the seeds of kindness grow themselves. The more you give unconditionally, the richer you are.
Giving doesn’t necessary have to involve money or tangible things. Giving can be as simple as to give your time to focus in the present moments whether they need shoulder to cry on, someone to just listen, or precious time to spend for important conversations, sharing silly jokes or even spending it by just reading together. And you do not need to be someone’s best friend or closest ones to be able to just do that. Some random people may start a conversation with you while you are sitting or waiting, and ending up you helping them solutions. This kind of act is also called kindness, my dearest ones. Another random act of kindness would be as silly as someone helps you to pick up things you drop.
Well, just a reminder that GOD, Universe, and Angels give you the right people at exactly the right time and they also place you at the right time with the right people who need you at that time. Funny, on how we are actually connected one to another even the relationship may just be for that time only.
Knowing the world is lacking of kindness, why do not we begin with oneself ? There is definitely nothing wrong by starting to get used to receiving kindness and to be kind. All of us deserves kindness and when we received kindness that is because truly, the deepest inside of us know that this kindness is what we needed the most at that specific of time. There is no need to feel ashamed or feel that you are lacking of being kind; in fact
“ Kindness is simply a complimentary gift or specific presents given from your GOD, Universe, and Angels to you — just for you. “
Thesaurus written that “ Kindness (n) is the quality of being friendly, generous and considerate — compassion and generosity. Generosity (n) is spirit of giving. (http://www.thesaurus.com) “
With that, I summed up kindness as the spirit of giving and receiving with compassion and without consideration. Why am I adding the word receiving because it takes two to tango for everything — giving and receiving. If one keep giving and the other is not receiving, then it is not going to work. Too much wars, injustice and other fears based emotions that make a lot of us are lack of act of kindness or ability to receive kindness.
Be kind to yourself is the first step. When we understand the concept of how worthy and precious we are, that’s when you understand “why receiving kindness and being kind to other matters” for you in your life. Acting kindness begins with you, be kind and gentle with yourself, my dearests.
